8 Quick Tips To Deal With Setbacks In An Uncertain And Changing World
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This week I was asked by one of my email subscribers:
“Do you have any tips on how to deal with setbacks and with that frustration of having to “start over” with fitness … and over and over and over ;)
And whilst constantly adapting to a highly changing environment?”
Well, what three brilliant questions for this time and when I’m re-starting blog. So here are 8 quick tips to dealing with training setbacks and frustration in an ever-changing and uncertain world.
QUICK TIP 1: BE PATIENT
I get setbacks. They suck. They’re frustrating. Trust me I’ve been there - 4 years of setbacks with health due to Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and daily setbacks with setting up a business!
When imagining success, you tend to think of it as a consistent upward trajectory, but in reality, it’s a mess. With up’s and down’s, and sometimes it feels more down’s than up’s!
But the key is to have PATIENCE. Patience with yourself and patience with the progress.
Fast short-term results do not give you the consistency and continual lifetime success that comes with long term solutions.
Laying down solid foundations with powerful habits and mindset practices will enable you to live a life you love forever. Mindset is everything.
QUICK TIP 2: CHOOSE YOUR REALITY
My friend and I were walking down Chiswick High street in London one summers day, when she suddenly said:
“Adelaide, there are SO many yummy mummys here!”
I was really taken aback. I couldn’t see any.
But then, all of a sudden those yummy mummys drinking lattes outside the cafes with their babies came into view. They were EVERYWHERE!
I had only been seeing the cute guys.
My friend and I were seeing different realities, because my friend was in a place in her life when she really wanted a husband and children - but didn’t even have a boyfriend. So her brain was pointing out to her everything she didn’t have.
I was single and looking for a hot guy to be with, so my brain was highlighting to me the attractive men - while dimming the yummy mummys, as it wasn’t something I wanted.
Your brain edits how you see the world according to what you tell it to look for - consciously or unconsciously.
By deliberately picking out and focusing on all the positive things in your life, you are telling your brain to highlight to you all of the awesome things going on in your world, which is crucial for maintaining optimism, positivity and motivation.
For example, when returning to exercise from a long break and you run 1km for the first time in a while, instead of ‘urghhh… I ran that SO slow.’ being you (and your brain’s) main takeaway, you want to celebrate and feel and see how AMAZING it is that you just ran 1km!
As it also means you can start to build on your fitness and run more and more! By this being your reality, it will be more fun and easier to return to exercise.
Choose your reality carefully, so on A conscious and unconscious level, you see one that empowers and helps you be the best version of yourself.
QUICK TIP 3: MAINTAIN CONFIDENCE
When overcoming a setback it’s important to maintain high levels of confidence that you’re going to come back even stronger - physically and/or mentally.
To maintain this confidence, you need to write down all of the POSITIVE EVIDENCE that consists of past activities and goals that you’ve completed and achieved, that shows and validates to you that you’ve got this.
Your positive evidence doesn’t have to be the same subject of the goal you want to achieve either.
For example, one of my clients underwent a knee operation and wanted to compete in Ironman Maryland, but the doctor couldn’t guarantee he would able to run a marathon again.
One of the key things was getting him in the right mindset to recover as best he could, in order to maximise his chances of running a marathon again (and again!).
Instead of dwelling on what the doctor said and everything that could wrong, we looked at ALL of the positive evidence that showed him if he recovered as best he could, he would be really increasing his chances of running that marathon.
We also listed out all of the positive evidence that showed him crushing setbacks and challenges, and coming through them even stronger.
It meant he felt driven and positive about his recovery and put in the extra work to get him there. He’s now running on tarmac and feeling really great about next year’s Ironman races.
QUICK TIP 4: KNOW YOUR WHYS
When wanting to return to exercise after a long break, it’s important to know WHY you want to exercise and train again.
Is it to….
Build fitness for a specific race?
Feel fit, healthy and strong?
Have energy to play with your kids?
Have confidence in how you look and feel?
Be a great role model for your friends, family and yourself?
Or maybe it’s a combination of these things, or other things that make you want to start your fitness journey again.
Knowing why you want to train and exercise is crucial to you actually following through and guiding you in how you want to do it.
If you’re wanting to return after pregnancy, how and when you exercise is going to look very different from returning after an injury. You might even want to jump back into a completely different sport than before.
List out why you want to return to exercise and training and use this as motivation and guidance in choosing the right way to exercise for you.
If you’re not sure what you’re why’s are, complete the task at the end of my blog ‘How to find your Why to stay motivated.’
QUICK TIP 5: DEFINE YOUR DAILY PROCESSES
What are the 3-5 key daily processes you have to complete each day to the best of your ability to achieve your goals and live your best life?
Knowing your non-negotiable and why each one is crucial to your success, will help you build your daily routine blueprint and stay on track to achieving your goals.
Your daily processes are signal tasks or habits that will keep your brain and body primed. My 5 key daily processes are:
Morning routine (Read about how to create a morning routine here)
Train
Client outreach routine
Social media
Evening routine (Read about how to create a morning routine here)
If you’re looking for more inspiration on what your daily routine and non-negotiable look like, read my blog ‘Plan your day like a Pro Triathlete’.
QUICK TIP 6: BREAK DOWN YOUR GOALS
All my clients come to me with one or more goals that they want to achieve, whether it’s getting a promotion, qualifying for Kona and/or podiuming at a race.
But what surprises me, is that more often than not it’s just in their head. They haven’t mapped out exactly how and when they’re going to achieve their goal.
This concerns me for two reasons:
Their goal is more of a pipeline dream
They haven’t maximised their chances of achieving that goal/dream
If I asked you, how are you going to achieve your goal? Would you be able to tell me the exact steps you need to take and when?
There’s nothing wrong with not knowing, but I really want you to achieve your goal.
So the first thing you need to do is decide on your realistic goal and then map out each physical action you need to take to achieve it, starting with the first small step.
For example, back in January one of my clients wanted to go on a really great summer holiday with his family. We found the first step to achieving this was talking with his wife on Thursday evening about where they wanted to go in August.
Now you’ve got your first step, chuck down the rest of things you need to do into bitesize pieces and schedule them into your calendar.
QUICK TIP 7: CHANGE YOUR LANGUAGE
The words you say and use are the structure and architecture of your thoughts, feelings and experiences. They can make the difference between achieving your potential - or falling short.
When I first start working with my clients, I ask them:
“How would you love to feel or what's your ultimate goal?”
They don't realise it, but they actually still tell me what they don't want with their answers. For example, 'I don't want to feel stressed about the world championship competition', or 'I don't want to be scared of dentists', or 'I don't want to be distracted', or 'I don't want to fall off the climbing wall'.
However, your brain cannot directly process negative words or phrases, such as ‘I don’t want to feel stressed’, without first getting in touch with those feelings/thoughts, so it understands the instruction of what not to think or feel about.
As a result, an instruction containing a negative has the complete opposite effect to the desired outcome.
For example, for the next 2 seconds I do NOT want you to think about Einstein riding a purple elephant juggling three pink monkeys.
Did you notice what happened? You immediately thought about it, because your brain is creating that image in your mind, as it prepares not to think about it!
This is what happens with your feelings and thoughts when you say 'I don't want to feel stressed', your brain triggers the pathway for stress.
So keep swapping your negative for positive thoughts to continuously point your brain in the direction you want to go in.
QUICK TIP 8: REALITY CHECK
It’s important when coming back from a setback that you’re choosing new goals and routines that are realistic and okay to have in your life.
So just ask yourself: Is it reasonable for me to achieve this? Is this change okay to have in my life?
If the answer yes - awesome!
If not, then change your plan and lower your results. It’s important to going into any change and transformation with realistic expectations. Because when we set big goals and continue missing them it can be very de-motivating.
Please share your thoughts below—I’d love to hear.
